A Day to Remember

   Yesterday God gave the people of middle Tennessee (and many other areas) a wonderful gift. A PERFECT day in February. After a few weeks of sickness and being stuck inside, some rainy days, and a few days being outside and thinking, "If it were only a few degrees warmer...", yesterday was extremely welcome and appreciated.

  On Wednesday night many people were anticipating the glorious day to come and were making plans to do some fun outdoor activities and change up the normal routine. My friend Amanda and I made plans at church to go to the zoo, just hoping that our babies would nap at the same time Thursday morning and make it easy for us.

  To my delight, Brody woke up as happy as can be and we enjoyed the morning together. I fed him breakfast and then he played in his pack n play while I sat on the hardwood floor one foot away from it and ate my bran muffin and drank my coffee. (This is what works for us, he can still see and almost touch mommy and I can eat breakfast without chasing him around.) Brody began his 2 1/2 hour nap within about 20 minutes of Tinley's long nap and I was able to make Ryan lunch, eat my own lunch, get ready, do some laundry, and actually listen to what Ryan was saying to me when he came home to eat lunch. (By the way, the phrase "nothing sweeter than a sleeping baby" has an evolving meaning)

  When Brody woke up we headed out to the zoo to meet Amanda and Tinley where I flashed my zoo membership card for the 2nd time this week and just walked in like a really important person and felt good about it because my friend didn't have to pay either. We spent a couple hours at the zoo with two perfect babies and enjoyed pushing those perfect sweeties in the swings for like 45 minutes while we just talked. Now to me, this is one of the most perfect scenarios, watching your child having fun and smiling while you can carry on a conversation with a girlfriend and only have to stop occasionally to stop you kid from putting the swing in their mouth (both of them). :)

 When I got home, we were sure Ryan would be home just any minute so we waited outside on the porch swing (for an hour) and then got very excited when he pulled into the driveway. We quickly got to work on hanging Brody's swing on a tree branch in the backyard. I had witnessed first hand the calming effects of a swing and needed the option at my house, thankfully I had just bought one at a consignment sale. All it needed was some new rope and a master plan on threading the new rope through and tossing it over the 15 foot high branch. With 100 feet of rope, a little "discussion", doubtful looks, almost breaking a bike helmet, some cutting, tying a weight to one end and tossing it over a tree branch, a lot of me sticking my tongue out while concentrating really hard, a tree pruner on a 6 foot stick,some scotch tape, tweezers, a nap, some playing fetch, and a blow torch..we have a pretty wobbly but safe (we think) airplane swing in the back yard. (To be continued...)

  To end the night, Ryan made breakfast for dinner, Brody took a bath..and I LOVE bath time, it's seriously one of my favorite parts of the day, a little relaxing, TV watching, and reading, lights out came at a reasonable time, and I closed my eyes thinking..these are the days I hope I remember. We didn't spend any money, or eat anything amazing, or do anything spectacular,I wasn't wearing my favorite clothes and I didn't even shower until 7:30 pm. But it was a perfect day.

(pictures to follow)

The Mommy Wars

There is something that has been bothering me a lot lately. I'm guilty of it and it really disgusts me so I am on a mission to change. There have been a million blog posts/books/notes/etc. written about this topic, but the advantage of having a blog is to get your thoughts and feelings out so that your husband doesn't have to listen to you talk about it yet again. As a mom, some of your biggest cheerleaders, and sadly, biggest naysayers are...other moms. We can be brutal to one another and it needs to stop. So I am starting with myself..I don't want to do it anymore, because I don't want people to do it about me, so please everyone encourage me and stop me from judging other moms. I want to apologize for saying something negative about you and questioning your choices..if you are a mom I have probably judged you..even if you're my friend..even if you're one of my best friends and I am really sorry!

Here are some of the topics that I have heard moms "discussing" about other mothers..and sometimes I heard it really well because it was me saying it.

• At what stage in life people choose to have children
• What they are going to name their child/children, and how it will be spelled
• If they are going to deliver naturally or get an epidural
• Breastfeeding/Formula 
• Stay at home mom/working mom
• Vaccines/Delayed/None
• Preschool/No preschool
• How much TV kids watch
• Clothes that mothers put on their kids
• The nursery decor
• When parents choose to take their baby out in public or to church for the first time
• Who and how long someone stays to help with the new baby
• Spanking/some spanking/no spanking
• The words parents use for all sorts of things..from the pacifier to using the bathroom
• How close people choose to have children
• How many children people want
• Public/Private school
• Extracurricular activities
• Bed times
• What people feed their kids
• Which seat parents choose to install the car seat in their car
• Pediatricians 
• Tummy sleeping/bumpers
• Baby sleeping the parents room/putting baby straight into the crib
• If parents choose to go on a trip without their young kids
• When to cut a child's hair

Pretty much anything could be added to this list but as I typed it I thought..wow most of these are extremely personal decisions! Different things work for different people, our tastes are all different and all kids are different! 

Do I have an opinion on pretty much every topic there is when it comes to parenting...sure! And I will gladly share it with you if you want to know, but I am striving to do that out of love and without judgement. 

One things I have learned form some of my best mommy friends is that even when they have a totally different opinion than me, they have made that choice out of love for their child or because they just don't think its a big deal! 

Our awesome preacher..Bill Watkins touched on children's behavior during church last night and as always..he had one sentence that just stuck with me. "If you wouldn't say it to them, don't say it about them." So unless its something that I feel is worth taking to my friend and encouraging her or trying to help her/warn her/ understand her..I don't need to say it to someone else. 

Mommy friends-join me, help me, encourage me PLEASE! I need your help to be better and I think that its hard enough to make all the right choices without someone talking about you behind your back. I'm going to do some things that you wouldn't do or that you think are weird..but unless you think it is going to hurt my family spiritually..try to let it go and I will show you the same courtesy.